Who Are You?

This is me. I like to refer to this look as 'au naturel'. No make up, no fancy hair. Gray roots are showing. I have dark circles around my eyes. I have splotchy skin.


I don't usually allow people to see me this way. Only the 'safe' people in my life get to see me in this state. When I say safe people, I mean the people in my life who I know will not reject me. The people who will love me unconditionally and not judge me by my appearance.



This look is analogous with the 'real me' with all of my flaws and imperfections. The person that I won't typically allow others to see for fear of judgement or rejection.



The real me has had many difficult times in her marriage.

The real me has experienced great pain.

The real me loses her patience with her children daily.

The real me struggles with self esteem issues.

The real me sometimes gets depressed.

The real me has a son who is gay.
The real me gets lonely.

The real me has struggled with addiction.

The real me....









This is me too. I clean up pretty good, huh? With make up, I effectively cover up the dark circles around my eyes, give my cheeks some color, darken up my eyelashes. Since I haven't taken time to dye it yet, I straighten my hair and style it in such a way so as to hide the gray roots. Throw on a smile and voila! I appear to look better, younger, happier, healthier.


This is comparable to the person you would see in church. I'll call her the church me.


The church me will smile and pretend that all is well.

The church me will tell you she's fine, thanks for asking.

The church me will tell you her kids are doing great.

The church me will talk about all of the good things God has done in her life.

The church me likes the acceptance she gets from people for being such a wonderful, well put together person.

The church me hides her real self because she fears if people knew the real her, they might judge her or shun her.



There are people in this world, in our towns, in our neighborhoods, in our workplaces who are hurting and need to see and feel the love of God (the one and only true God) who knows the 'real' them and loves them anyway. Unfortunately, many of 'those people' won't go to church because they see all of the church people with their masks on pretending that they have it all together. (Only the people who have it all together should be in church, right?!)

They're afraid that if they go to church, they will be judged and rejected. And, they're probably right. I've seen it happen! Shouldn't the people of the church be 'safe' people--accepting the hurting people of the world because we realize our brokenness as sinners in a fallen world?

I want to be a part of the church that doesn't reject the hurting, struggling people, but embraces them and welcomes them because there is HOPE for everybody and church is exactly where they need to be.



As Christmas approaches, my prayer is for the broken--that they would know that Jesus came and died just for them. That they would feel comfortable in God's house, worshipping with all of us other sinners. That they will be embraced by the family of God.

Planning Ahead

It's that time of year again! Halloween is over. Thanksgiving is near. And there is already Christmas music playing in the stores! I get why they do that whole 'start the Christmas season earlier and earlier each year' thing. Every year it seems like time goes by faster and faster and before you know it, Christmas is here!

I love the Christmas season. I love the lights, the music, the presents, gathering with the family, the snow, the decorations! What's not to love?!

Another thing that I enjoy about Christmas is our family's yearly tradition of giving to someone outside of our family. Now is the time to start researching the possibilities. There are so many people in need. I'm sure the possibilities for making a difference in the life of someone in need are endless! (I'm also gathering ideas for an outreach for my church small group.)

Here are just a couple of options I've come up with....

This is one of my favorites. It's called Chicks 4 Chicks. I love the idea of supplying women in Ethiopia with 2 chickens and a rooster so that they have a means of caring for themselves and their families. It's a gift that keeps on giving!! Eggs to eat. Eggs to sell. Chicks to raise. Chicken to eat. Love it! A bonus to donating to this cause is that we can donate in the name of a friend or family member. That's pretty cool!!

Another idea is this. It's a ministry that is caring for a community in Africa. There are many ways to help the people and children in the Bugabo village. We could donate money for water, education, or health care, sponsor a child, or purchase items from the store to support the ministry. We could also donate money for shoes for the villagers to protect their feet. The shoes are made by men and women in the village--a great way to provide for their families.

What are some of YOUR favorite ministries?

Fall Fun

Having a little fun in the leaves with 3 of my daughters. Hmmm....I wonder if it's warm...or cold...

A photo opportunity for all 4 of my daughters

Leaf fight!

Guess what we had to do after our leaf fun?!

That's right! HAIR! :)

Group Hug

I am a firm believer in the value of community!  I have come to find that sharing our burdens and experiences with others helps us to find support and strengthens our commitment in our endeavors. 
Take Weight Watchers, for example.  It is a tried and true weight loss plan.  The secret to WW's success is in the community.  Sharing our stories and our struggles, our victories and failures.  Learning that we're not alone on this journey.  Finding help and advice from others who have been there. 
AA is another such example of a group of people with a common background gathering to encourage and coach one another.
 I'm sure we've all experienced the value of finding a group of individuals who can relate to our situations.   
During our adoption process, I found so much strength, support and encouragement from other families who were adopting and from families who had already adopted.  It felt good to know that I wasn't alone and to share my journey with others!
Recently on this blog, I have shared about my struggles with raising a child from a hurt place who struggles with attachment issues.  It hasn't been easy to step out and admit that it has been a problem.  For some reason it's so much easier to talk about the sunny side of adoption and raising children.  Makes me feel more successful, like somehow I'm a better mother if I don't admit I have hard times.  Yet, in taking that risk, I have found an awesome community of  people who have also had the same struggles.  Some who are still in the throes and chaos of it all and can relate. Some who have figured it out and can lend encouragement and hope.  I have felt the power of prayers of this community.  I have seen a change in my attitude and  in my daughters behavior.  I know that there will be seasons of stress and difficulty, but for now I thank God that it is better and that it is good! 
Thank you to all who have offered advice, a kind word of encouragement, or prayer--they are cherished!  Can we have a group hug?! :)